Written in 2004
Now I know that in some circles I’ve got a reputation linked with sex. And in the past, I have taken great pleasure in concocting sexually arousing stories that on the surface sometimes appear to be not as they truly are..but first let’s go back in time..
As a 12-year old I was writing very naughty stories about the teachers at school. My friends Felicity, Lesley and I would get together at the weekend and write the next episode for the coach ride to our games field on Monday. The storylines were excuses for sexual scenes.. rather like a bad porn film.
The structure and content was largely based on Harold Robbins’ The Carpetbaggers, a book I’d read under plain cover because it was pretty sexually explicit and opened our young eyes to a new world of penetration, dirty sex, raunchy sex, sex in wild places, urgent sex and slow langurous anticipated sex…
We learned of what it was like to be a woman hungry for men and how men lusted after women.. and we even got scenes of women with women…
Robbins was my first writing mentor. He wrote in such detail that the reader was able to identify deeply with the experience.. if you know what I mean.
Although our writing was explicit it was not horny it was rip-roaringly knicker-wettingly funny. This was largely due to our lead characters..the Misses Letcher, Nash and Woolley [our elderly teachers] and Stringer [the equally elderly porter being the only male presence and therefore featuring in all sex scenes with all characters!]… These ancient crocks [to us] were the absolute antithesis of characters likely to be featured in a porn film
It is obvious now that the seeds were beginning to grow inside me..
I slide sexual undertones into some stones that I write therapeutically and when I work with clients there is always a sexual undertone designed to generate sometimes dormant sexual energy… And it’s done with complete integrity and never taken too far.. just enough to light the pilot light and always diverted away from association with me.
I talk to people and add in vocal tones that are flirtatious and sometimes sexual, but always with a sense of what’s right and a sense of fun and just going a little bit further.
And sometimes words seem to mean something else as well..AND it gives me deep pleasure to do this, because,of course, in order to bring in the flavour of sex into writing, a writer has to in some way recreate the experience in his or her body in order to find the words to express it truly..and without device.
If there’s a sexual connotation to be found, I’ll find it. My friend Judith says she sorts for ‘weird’ and judging by the stories she tells, that’s very accurate! Me I sort for ‘sex’. Just as tiny specks of dirt on the carpet jump out at my mother, sexual connotation and double entendre jump out for me. Hmm, which one would you rather be blessed with….
It seems to amuse people and it definitely amuses me to be like this. In fact it delights me to be naughty and playful.
Sex has been a major part of my life. You can smile wickedly here which is what you might do were you to hear the voice tone and body language that comes out when I’m talking like this!! But I’m not talking about my sex life here..
When I was 22 I was the assistant editor of a sex magazine called Forum. My job was to cull the newspapers and find the sex related stories which I then revamped and compiled into a column ‘Forum News’. That wasn’t all I did and there’s a whole host of topics for a blog on that micro-era of my life alone.
As for the rest, well I’ll just say for now that there’s a legacy that in some way I have drawn on to create what I create.. but I’m not talking about sex anymore…
I’m talking about blogging…it fascinates me..as does writing in a way that’s pleasurable and delightful and draws people in.. not all… I don’t want them all.. just those who resonate, vibrate and feel the connection…. as I’m sure you’ll understand… we only want to be with people who think we’re amazing because we are the way are..
When I first heard of blogging I realised that it is what I’ve been doing for ages on lists and in emails and newsletters to people across the world … for me [I am blessed with the skill of touch typing] it was a natural environment for the writing down and publishing of my thoughts on the internet. It’s what I’m doing right now.
Blogging will no doubt be brought up in the printed media under the headline ‘Is blogging the new.. I’m not going there.. but to somewhere much deeper in the psyche of what’s happening in this online world.
Blogging is just the tip of the surface of the deep seated volcanic human potential and thought that is as yet unerupted and unleashed…
There is powerful passion waiting like the coals of the fire for the passing of air to fuel them into action… It is there, and it’s important to know that it is there.. and in some ways it has been contained too long.. it is waiting for release… out into the world.. it is seeking to express itself.. in the same way that people come together driven by that DNA program to unite and create..
In eastern holistic bodymind traditions, the hara or lower dantien the area just below the navel, the second chakra is considered to be the storehouse of all energy.. and it is associated with reproduction, sexual power AND creativity of all kinds and there are many ways to unite and create..which can be as deliciously pleasurable as that way..
Blogging is part of the massive wave of social change that is happening across the community of people belonging to the micro-cosm of the connected world.
The internet is a powerful tool with unlimited potential to spread possibility and hope and love
When people begin to connect in this way, drawn to those words expressing ideas that appeal to you and make sense to you.. a wave begins.. and word spreads like wildfire across the weblands.. and you begin to come together.. in sensational ways..
And I thought, in a way, a blog could be thought of as a B(e) log.
We are part of a world where people all over are beginning more and more to indulge in the art of expressing themselves freely..on topics from arranging a funeral to how the world came about.
The media has simply been feeding a long-spun deep rooted hunger for real life stories. It’s not new. Truth is stranger than fiction is one of those ‘folk wisdoms’ that have been handed down through the ages.
When I lived in a small village in Portugal, gossip, stories about what people are up to was a form of entertainment. Throughout time people have been connecting through the media of stories about their families, ancestors and ways, villages thrived on gossip but also created an intimacy where people looked out for each other and cared.
News was carried from one town to another via the medium of human storytelling. And as the media evolved and opened out all that came after and then TV slowly took over as a major controller of information.
TV concocted stories for us, fiction based on some kind of perfect fantasy of how life is. It plied us with pictures of the body beautiful and oozed sexual promise from it’s tiny tubelike cathodes…. and yet the when the fantasy came to an end and there was no substance… in the end, it’s someone else who gets the girl or gets to express themselves.
BUT times have changed. Now the media no longer controls information. We the people control it. TV is opening out to the public and there’s always been radio talk shows where people could phone in and have their say, but NOWHERE has so much space for public expression been afforded to so many people as on the internet.
The internet is a hotbed of freedom to be…freedom to indulge your fantasies, build your dreams and connect with like minded people… uniting to create pleasure, delight, joy and anything you wish..
People are not just expressing themselves they’re beginning to tell truths. The world is waking up for years of sleepytime media hypnosis. But beware there’s just as much hypnosis out there as there is on the TV.
It’s for you to choose the way that’s a match and fit for you and to follow the words that delight and excite you always checking for integrity and truth..you’ll know..when it resonates.
Blogging is part of the new wave of freedom of expression that the internet has afforded us.. As the internet has been growing over the years, people who might never have had access to normal publishing have over the years been able to express themselves in writing on the internet first via e-mails, then lists and websites.
Now more and more of us than ever have our own sites.. your own shop window exposing in various ways who you are. Lists have continued to grow affording an ease into the idea of writing a blog and going public. For some a list is a place where they can begin to take those first tender steps to showing a little of yourselves and meanwhile..Instead of thinking someone might read it, we’re thinking.. I want people to read this..I want to show them who I am.. because I’m delighted to be me..
People are exposing themselves like never before.. It’s no longer sensational to discover someone has a web cam in their house and is doing an Osbornes on the net, exposing their lives in ways more intimate than we ever dreamed of doing until now..
And finding its natural medium, the sex trade has embraced the internet with all the excitement and glow of dollars in the eyes of a Madame being offered a lifetime lease on premises in the world’s top hotels with a double page free advert in every airline magazine [and probably in all the alumni/old-boy magazines too]
But I digress… alongside the sex trade and business ordinary people are taking their rightful place on the podium of the internet. No longer is the mass exposure of ideas dependent on TV or radio. Politicians watch out..
And as these so-called ordinary people put themselves out there.. they are of course not ordinary.. they are by expressing themselves already opening to the extra-ordinary and all the previously unleashed desires begin to seep out.. and slide and sometimes explode into and across the bosom of world.. creating their own channels, driven in a way to connect and commune in many pleasurable ways with people like them…
The potential of this is mindblowing. And one of the results of this is that when you open a little and coyly allow the world to see that first glimmer of the corners of your mouth turning up.. following the train of energy that started at another level and rises… you tenderly put yourself out there, little by little and the more you are like this, yourself…the more your scent floats on the airwaves your intimate spores carried in the wind.. primed to sniffout and magnetically connect with people who are a match and fit for you… and they too have their antennae extended and are sending out their pheremonic messages.. this is who I am.. and the purer the message, the purer the match.. and like this you will begin to attract people who are like you…
I am already coming up with exciting ways to express myself on unusual yet very potent mediums so that I will be much more exposed in truth thus attrating someone who is fascinated and delighted by me and I by him enough for us to travel along some or all of our ongoing mutual journeys through life.. and all the pleasures as yet folded in are I sense, already in the process of unfolding..because I am like this..You too can access this way… of becoming juicy enough inside to attract the be es…
And as you pursue your way to delight it is also useful to keep in ready but relaxed awareness that people who are not so nice connect with people who are not so nice and there are places you know not to go and at the same time it’s possible to comfort yourself fully in the knowing that you have a chance to stem this tide and be part of generating another wave.. a much more powerful and delightful wave of ever expanding energy around wanting the world to be wholly complete… and to dream the dream of everyone having access to the pleasures that you are beginning to taste and are juicily savouring…before you swallow..the pleasures of being yourself and releasing your unqualified potential into the world as you are fully experiencing this thing we call life..
The web and this new world of blogs is the space in which we can make a huge difference.. influencing people with thoughts that have positive intentions.
Author’s comment – 2017 – at this point I went off into a hypnotic trance which has to be read in the flow.. it is designed specifically.. using all manner of wordskills
It means that the energies of people who want good things for the world will begin to swell and grow…tickling slowly on the edge of the darkness as slowly it feels the pleasure and the urgency of the de-light and the urge to open out is almost irresistible and it might.. be only a light sensation at first as the idea of what is possible begins to tap at the edge of lower awareness..slowly gently prodding the dark depths..sliding in..and back out…waiting in readiness.. for readiness..reaching for the spot… where you are generating readiness to be..come.. and from within the dark the sparks begin.. setting off vibrations, micro-moments of pleasure, binding together and increasing., pulsating a rhythm as the enormity of it all touches the depths of desire waiting wanting rising and crashing on this this delicious wave-like sensation of being..purely, yourself.^.^.^.^.^.^.^.^moving to the beat of the rhythm of you, the perfect tone and timbre, resonating feelings rising and falling heart beating faster, breath drawn from deep deep down…. connecting you to the deepest possibilities of passion within and as you open out completely and utterly your body becomes one with the experience mind and body melded in a huge somatic wave after wave flowing through and over you and at that moment there is nothing else..simply deep, pure and absolute pleasure.. the pleasure of you..at your best..out there, tickling and titillating the fancy of others as you go through your daily life.. sending out the spores of delight.. here and there in the way that is right for you…. … ‘leaving no one behind..’
And as you begin to come back to the regular rhythm^.^.^.^. there is the knowing that there is ALWAYS an opportunity to release and shine a ray of hope or interest or delight or connection on someone, ^.^.^.[smiles work wonders as does learning to laugh at life and yourself]..and there are imaginations waiting for you to fertilise them with a tiny speck of an idea…or a gentle move in the right direction.. or allowing those pleasurable thoughts to flow through you… and like this I wonder what ways you will find to put yourself out there in the world..in all your juicy glory…